Recently it has been brought to my attention by the Seoul Times that there exists the possibility that, brace yourselves, the Chinese are eating aborted fetuses for health.  Enjoy that link by the way, it contains fetus carnage.

To be a logical person at all, one of the first reactions that you should have felt upon hearing and seeing this is, well, doubt.  Skepticism is vital to finding the truth.  But, is there really enough disproof of this to assume that it is false?  Well, one foul mouthed and very rude "journalist of 30 years" certainly thinks that the "truth is out there" and that he has single-handedly debunked this "myth" by straining really hard to disbelieve.

I tend to take a more rational approach in my methods, holding this "baby soup" phenomenon in the space between belief and disbelief.  Being open to rationality, I will list a few things that can be used as evidence both for and against the possibility of this being true.

Evidence:

• Chinese Traditional Medicine (alternative medicine), approves, condones and encourages the consumption of foods such as bats, tiger penises, and other obscure foods and herbs ... often regardless of the legality or ethical considerations of consumption of that food (such as the fact that tigers are endangered).
• Humans have a long history of cannibalism, both in times of need and ritualistic cannibalism.  Since we know this, and that traditional medicine exists, the concept of eating babies for health concerns is suddenly plausible.
• Photographic evidence of the reported evidence exists.
• No concrete disproof of Zhu Yu's art exhibit "Eating People" ... despite many sites claiming it as fake.

Battlefield: 

Having played Battlefield 2 for approximately 5 years (My Stats), now, and having before that been an avid player of Battlefield 1942, when I learned that the 2008 Mod of the Year was awarded to a Battlefield Modification, I had to try it.  I have enjoyed the FPS since Wolfenstein, and of all of them that I have played, the Battlefield series seems to consistently deliver the most adrenaline pumping, cinematic, fun action sequences (Though the Action Quake and Action Half-Life 2 games provided a really, really good romp, too).  That being said, my only criticism of most FPS games is generally a lack of realism (Which is why I don't play BF2142 very much even though I have most of the unlocks).  I hate having to shoot a guy 3+ times on average for him to drop, and BF delivers in this sense.  Project reality promised to make sure that this wouldn't be the case, even moreso than BF2.  I was in.

Project Reality:

What is Project Reality (Trailer, Youtube)?  It takes Battlefield from being a "game" to being closer to a "Simulation".  Not completely, fun gameplay elements are kept, but, it moves it towards combat simulation.  Tactics actually matter in this game, and, while it is sometimes disappointing that I can't rely on myself to charge into a room and kill a whole squad, the added lethality of Project Reality increases the necessity for good teamwork and common sense.  This game is not for people with short attention spans or impatient individuals.  The fun of playing Project Reality is the sense of accomplishment that comes with successfully capturing an objective, wiping out an enemy squad, or even assisting another squad in doing so by giving them a helicopter ride.  

The game adds layer after layer of complexity to the game, erasing many of Battlefield's copious "abstractions".  Gone are the ever-present mini-map and UAV scans, easily dropped in mortars, always visible crosshairs on screen, and kill spam.  These are replaced by their real-life equivalents, communication, target lasing and coordination with the commander (Check out the JDAM), iron sights and scopes, and the realism of not knowing whether or not the guy you shot at 200 meters away actually died or not when you saw his turban fall below the hedge he was firing from.  Also missing from PR is the health bar, which has been replaced with a realistic injury model that allows soldiers to be shot and bleed to death.  Very cool, because now that medic is really, really important, since spawning right back up in the battlefield is not quite so easy, and fighting while injured is a difficult task.  

Some more interesting differences between BF2 and PR: 

Project Reality soldiers won't be bunny hopping, dolphin diving, and C4 suicide running (well, the insurgents might do this last one).  Instead, they'll be hiding in windows, outflanking you, landing on rooftops, establishing firebases, and planting IEDs.  You won't find 10 snipers on the enemy team, nor be faced with constant grenade spam.  Kits are limited, and getting close enough to throw a grenade is something you WON'T generally want to try to do.  One man becoming an insurmountable force in your team's tank that he hopped in just before you got there is NOT an element of PR.  You can't use enemy tanks (you don't know how, soldier), and tanks and APCs require 2 people at a minimum to operate properly (the turrets even take about 20 seconds or so to "warm up" and make ready).

One of the first big things you'll notice will be the size of the maps, and the revamped sounds.  Gunshots in the distance give a realistically muffled thunder, while nearby gunshots deliver a loud crack.  Automatic gunfire will resound through an area and tip you off that there's a battle going on in the distance that you might need to be aware of.  Helicopters can be heard from really far away, so, their landing position has to be carefully chosen to avoid ambushes.   You can see far enough into the distance that people look like little ants running around (and this is very well done and adds greatly to the feeling of realism, as, being able to see a whole forest from a mountaintop is both useful and realistic), something that very rarely happens in BF2.

Because assets are worth tickets as well, individuals won't be bee-lining for them and "one-manning" them over to the enemy base just to get blown up.  Server admins will kick you for doing this because it injures your whole team.  Vehicles don't respawn quite so quickly, and, the maps are often 1-4 kilometers in size, which means if you strand your team by wasting vehicles, there's a good chance you've lost the match for them.  As a Project Reality soldier, you'll come to appreciate deeply the efforts of expert helicopter pilots, who follow protocols and understand that their work is often the difference between winning and losing an engagement.  This is a far cry different from the typical "use it till it explodes" mentality of regular Battlefield.  

Being shot really sucks, even almost being shot really sucks, which is a very cool thing.  This makes covering fire useful.  Bullets bouncing off of the ground or walls near your head will cause your screen to blur and darken as you become stressed out from the battle (Check out this video for an example of how it works).  This gives you incentive to not keep your head out in the open, and a good player will even learn to use this to his advantage.

A single guy in a jet no longer scores 100 kills in a match and locks down the entire enemy team, as in Battlefield 2.

Reviving a fallen comrade is no longer just a quick shock.  Now you have to actually stick him with an epipen and apply bandages until he stops bleeding, a process that takes about 30-40 seconds... sometimes you even have to "resuscitate". 

Another cool difference is that the squad leader is a bit more important now.  He's no longer a roaming spawn point.  He and two others must establish a spawn point somewhere in the field.  But, there's more to him than that, with access to the "officer" kit, the squad leader can actually deploy structures, and with the help of his squad, establish foxholes, machine gun nests, sandbag walls, and the like, all of which can be put to use to devastating effect in the hands of a talented squad leader.  This is cool, because now instead of having just 1 commander and 32 guys, you end up with a commander, 5-7 squad leaders, and a collection of people working under each of those, each filling a useful, fun to play role.  

This all comes together and results in a more rich, deep gameplay, that is equally more rewarding. 

Battlefield vs. Project Reality  

Ultimately, does Project Reality REPLACE Battlefield 2 in my gaming collection, or do I still play both?

Well, that's a tough question.  I am excited to see what changes they have made in 1.50 for BF2, it's rumored to fix many of the small grievances I've lived with for 5 years in the series.  Ultimately, for the past 2 weeks, yes, it has consumed my gameplay, pulling me away from BF2, Counterstrike, and my various other source mods and MMO gaming (even pulling me out of a couple coveted closed betas that I'm in right now, yeesh).  So, for me, they have taken a great thing that I am seasoned with, and made it wholly different in enough ways that I am excited to play again, so, the PR team gets mad props for that (did I just say "mad props"?  Hello 1997).  I do warn, however, that the game is NOT for everyone, as there is a relatively steep learning curve that will seperate serious gamers from casual gamers fairly quickly (Training servers are constantly running and you are encouraged to go there to train, learn how to fly, learn the kits or how to request them, to lase, to drive tanks, etc).

There are of course, a few glaring problems here and there, such as how the kits work and the timers involved which could be worked on a little, and maybe just a couple more transport vehicles here and there on some of the larger maps (there are lulls in the action, unfortunately) would be welcome, but overall, I haven't had this much fun gaming in years.  

It's easy to think that "more realism" = "less fun", but that's not true.  More realism, done the way Project Reality has done it, is definitely more fun.  While it's cool to play Battlefield 2's more "action movie" version of warfare, the gut-wrenching, "keep your head down and return-fire", covering-fire-is-useful, "oh-my-God pop smoke and get the fuck out of here!", "Let's sneak around the side of this mosque while they're engaged from the west!", "Enemy fire incoming from heading 2-2-5!!!" version of video game warfare is so much more rewarding to be a part of, that I'm not sure if I'll ever click that little "2" on my desktop again.

How to Play:

It's easy (But make sure your microphone works, it's really important in PR!):

1) Make sure you've got BF2 installed and patched up (not 100% sure if it works with 1.5 beta at time of this writing).

2) Go over to www.realitymod.com and click "downloads".  MAKE SURE YOU GET BOTH CORE AND LEVELS DOWNLOADS.  They are each in the 1.5 gig range for a big 3 gigabyte download, but, if you stick with the game and make it over the learning curve, it's worth it.  (I suggest Orbit Downloader for use with any browser, as it will greatly speed up the download for you.)

3) Run the Core installer, then the Levels installer.

4) Click the icon that the levels installer put on your desktop, click training, pick a server, and start learning.  

5) When you're ready (probably an hour or two later after step 4), click on deployment, pick a server, and get in the game. 

If you want to meet up with me in game, use the chat link to the right to find me.  I'm JK JudgeX in game, generally tagging along with JK Tenchi and/or JK Mikado.  We'll gladly train you up and accept you into our squad if you're a decent player.

Piracy is popular because prices are too high.

Feel free to re-read that opening, underlined sentence as many times as it takes for you to understand it completely, because it is an irrefutable truth. 

According to this article, The Pirate Bay guys actually got convicted for the high crime of having a website that can be used to steal software (Like Google!).   

It is unrealistic for the music and video game industries to believe that people will pay $15 for a CD that has only 2 songs on it that people want, or $50 for a game that might not run properly, will break, or just plain sucks. These prices were alright when the technologies were new, but, now music and video games have been in the format long enough that they are everywhere.

To try so hard to "fight piracy" and keep the prices reasonable is an act of nothing but pure greed. Yep, people deserve to be paid for their work, but, as thousands and thousands more games are created each year, and thousands and thousands of new artists emerge each year, the VALUE of the individual song or game decreases.

That's basic supply and demand, but, the stranglehold in place by the big corporations that operate the creation, distribution, and retail of games and music is so tightly organized that prices are FIXED. Walk down the aisle of a game or music store. Look at the CDs and Games. Do you *honestly* think that all of the little boxes are worth what's on the sticker? Do you *honestly* believe that each one of those had the same production cost from soup to nuts, the same packaging and shipping cost, and the same procurement cost and profit margin placed on it by the retailer? Of course not. The prices of brand new games or CDs should be HIGHLY VARIED based on production cost and several other factors... but, they aren't really priced fairly.

I've paid $50 for several games that got no more than 2 evenings of play because they sucked. I've bought CDs that got maybe one playing on my CD player. You can scream that "piracy is wrong" all you want and type up all the snarky little responses you want about "stealing" and "artist compensation"... but the fact is, piracy will always be a "problem" of anything of a digital nature with an inflated and overly controlled value. 

Piracy is the natural market response to overpriced goods. Yep, there will still be SOME piracy when games cost $0.18... but, not very much. You want to take less damage from pirates? Reduce your prices. You want to seem like an overbearing, terrible, old-school, nasty company? Prosecute people for enjoying your games enough to share them with other people who don't have the cash to shell out for them, but still want to experience what you've put together. 

Anyway, congratulations on your symbolic little victory there... your draconic adherence and following of mentally retarded copyright laws will serve you well for the next few years, until service-based gaming takes over, and rental-monies and individual track sales are the best you'll get out of your preciously overpriced games and music. 

Assault Weapons?

As an American and owner of "assault rifles", I am highly offended that my freedoms would be intruded upon out of a lack of trust in me as a loyal, law-abiding citizen. An "assault rifle" does nothing that a normal hunting rifle cannot do. Conversion to "fully automatic" is as easy in a handgun as it is in a semi-auto AK-47. It all has to do with spring tension/hammer types/etc, which can all be modified easily. If you intend to disagree with me on this point, I will REQUIRE that you have watched in full the following youtube video:

That being watched, I anticipate zero arguments... because you have none.In reality, the common shotgun, used for hunting, is far more lethal than any of these "assault rifles" (which isn't a real classification of weapon, by the way, look it up). The shotgun leaves behind less evidence for forensics teams, and discharges a large, red shell that is easy for a criminal to walk over and pick up after he has committed his crime. Since almost everyone has access to a 12-gauge, if you really want to tackle gun-crime, you need to start with the 12 gauge, .38 caliber, and 9mm pistol, as they are the ones that most crimes are done with, and the most police officers have been killed with, while "assault rifles" don't even make up 1%. Source: http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/pub/bjs/pdf/guic.pdf

Why do you have one?

People have asked "What are you doing with an assault rifle if it's not for killing people." I have a few answers:

1) Target practice, as, an AK-47 is affordable and easier to modify to fit my hands and body than any regular "hunting rifle"... with easily available extendable stocks, easy to swap out scopes and sights, and readily available magazines for ammo.

2) Defending my home/property from both criminals and dangerous animals. Try to take down a bear with a 9mm sometime, and tell me if your child survived the attack, then come and tell me I shouldn't have an AK-47.

3) Collecting. It is a historical, beautiful piece of machinery that I enjoy having as a conversation piece and as a functional tool... and I should have every right to do so, since I'm not a criminal.

4) In the event of a national catastrophe, which, you may choose to deem impossible, situations could arise in which I am pitted against foreign invaders or my own lawless countrymen. Should this unlikely and horrifying event take place, a properly armed populace (as the founders of this country proved, espoused, and wrote into the Constitution which we are both bound by law to uphold) is essential for safety.

5) In the event of a tyrranical government, the founding fathers, and myself and many others, support the right of the populace to oust the ruling caste and establish their own government. Even if that government is the one THEY established, they understood the necessity and importance of policing those who govern with the threat of being replaced. "Assault Rifles" as you call them, are suited for this task far better than pistols.

From the United States Declaration of Independence:

"That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from theconsent of the governed, That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness."

Since said government being replaced might opt to violently oppose its citizenry, our founding fathers were wise enough to include the second amendment: "A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed."

Play it how you'd like, but to prevent pre-1800's style tyrrany and imperialism, people must be allowed to arm themselves against possible oppressors.  A very large part of the reason that you are not right now oppressed is because of the firearm, and the difficulty it imposes upon despotism.  You've taken it for granted, and forgotten why we are free.   

Why do I care?

I live in a place that is known to have a serious drug and burglary problem, and even just last year, a house two down from mine had its front window shot out by a criminal who got caught breaking in. One block from there, an arsonist burnt down a house and killed an elderly woman on the top floor. My next door neighbor had a brick thrown through his window while he was away as someone tried to break into his house. Diagonally across the street in both directions in plain view from my porch have lived drug dealers, and a friend of mine and myself have both had our vehicles broken into. I need to be able to protect myself and my family, and the weapons I choose with which to do so are none of anyone's business, but I'll tell you right now... it's a .45, a 9mm, a 12 gauge, an AK-47, and various knives and swords. 

Naturally, when national importance is given to this subject, I get a little upset.  I am highly disappointed in many people who otherwise espouse really good sentiments about how we should take care of one another, and how corporate America has devolved into a mercenary-economy.  I am highly disappointed in people would would call themselves "liberals" who then turn around and want to take away a "freedom" from people just because it's one they don't enjoy, and one they erroneously blame on the tool of the crime.  And of course I am greatly embarassed that the majority of those who agree with me are the ones who so loudly scream that they are "patriotic" and "Christian" that it lumps me in with said idiots.  If you were "patriotic" before 1776, it meant you supported the King of England.  This is a Democracy of Free Individuals, kiddos... don't try to legislate against me.  My right to swing my fist ends exactly where your nose begins.  My right to crack off rounds from my AK-47 ends when the sound would be disturbing the peace and/or the bullets would be causing property damage or killing you.  Punish the criminals, not people who happen to use the same tools for good purposes. 

Conclusion:

This right is not something to play with and invent terminology for. If you rally to ban a type of gun, all guns that fit the FUNCTION, not the FORM of said gun must also be up for banning, not just a particular subset. But, you don't want that because you know the overwhelming answer to your political move would be "NO". This would, without a doubt, cripple your political wrangling, so, you give it up.If you read my whole post, you assumed I was a conservative republican the entire time. You are incredibly, incredibly wrong. I am a very Liberal Democrat in all social matters, and this is my honest opinion. I am not an ignorant, toothless moron. I am a college educated, gainfully employed, taxpaying member of society... and I think I should be treated as one, and not as an idiot or criminal because I enjoy the firearms hobby. Republicans and conservatives are wroung about many, many issues, but gun control is one that they tend to be correct about. Freedom is freedom.

Comments welcome, but if you're an idiot, go ahead and keep to yourself.

Regarding an article discussing the decrease in the number of Chrisitians in the USA and the increase in the number of Atheists...

(It cannot be lifted, mended, or repaired with hostility nor hubris...)
Reply:
As a Christian, I am glad to see the religion decline. Why? Because too many Christians don't read and think about the Bible, and consume themselves with judging others. This is the result.... just like a bad parent, who brow-beats a kid for every halfway ill-step and won't let their kids watch even remotely tasteless TV, alienation is the end result. So, not only will these people see the country turn against them before they die, but most of them will probably have kids that move across the country and never speak to them again.

It's tragic, really, but, thus is the wage of judging.

Some tips for the modern Christian:
1) Teach by example.

2) Try to lean towards saying "I don't do that because..." as opposed to "never do that."

3) Respect the beliefs of others, even when they differ from your own.

4) This is a logical age, do not make statements that you cannot logically support, (Abortion is wrong!!! won't get you anywhere... you need a solid, prepared argument, and the ability to discuss it rationally to make an impact... and, sadly, that one's not even in the Bible unless you wrangle "murder" into it.)

5) Give up the focus on homosexual lifestyles. Your anger and distaste for them is not going to change them. They are people, and it's really sad that you have to be reminded... but their "sin" of homosexuality is no worse than your sin of thinking actor X or actress Y is sexy. All things of the flesh, people.

6) Stop trying to fight Science. Science, whether you like it or not, has the capability to greatly reduce human suffering. The teachings of it that conflict with the bible must be tolerated, if not incorporated into your beliefs. Scientific understanding is humanity discovering the tools of God. Stop with the "playing God"... if God didn't want man to learn from stem cells, he would have made them so mysterious that we couldn't learn from them, or he would have at least told us in the Bible.

7) Watch some racy TV or Movies, even rated R. Relax. Quit thinking that things are going down hill. In the time of Jesus, public executions, gladiators, disease, and poverty were completely commonplace by comparison to the modern world... quit pretending like the world's on fire in order to promote your religion. 

People don't buy it when they hear you saying that and then immediately two blocks over they hear the ice cream truck. If they heard the rumble of chariots and the murder of children a couple streets over on a regular basis as in Roman and Greek times, maybe you'd have a point. My point is... things aren't that bad... get with the times... and ease up... your kids will love you and people will listen.

 Just some thoughts. 

Palm Springs, The Hilton, ESRI Developer Conference, and more...

 
The desert Hatter, close to where I stepped in a giant pile of dog shit on the sidewalk.  Awesome.

So, I'm on a business trip to Palm Springs right now, for the ESRI Developer conference.  I think most people would really enjoy a chance to get out of ol' West Virginia and kick back in the sun, but, for me, not so much.

I appreciate the opportunity to learn things that may be useful for my work, but, at the same time, I really want to be home right now.  I find this place to be incredibly boring.  Everything closes at 9 or 10 PM, the Hilton sucks as far as hotels go (no complimentary anything, lame room service, water conservation, price, early departure penalties, no room service after 9 PM... etc etc).  

The town of Palm Springs is nicely constructed, and relatively amazing for what it is... a town in the desert that has become something of a tourist trap.  I see absolutely no vacation appeal here.  There's no beach, no amusement park, nowhere good to shop, nothing...  except for some pretty good food.

I'll break down Palm Springs as follows: 

Stores:
Tons of little tourist traps in which to sink cash on knick knacks you'll never use or look at... a neat place called  "The Alley" that has nothing you can't find in your hometown for much cheaper.  Crystal & Faeries stores, specialty "Latino" book stores, and a gay clothing shop (because they don't fit into normal clothes).  The best store we found was called "Cold Noses Warm Hearts" which was a really nice little pet store.  The prices were a bit too high for me to bite, but the store is well done, with a courtesy water bowl outside for passing canines - bravo for this.

Food:
It's a tourist location, so, the food is good.  Kiyosaku's sushi is really, really good...  definitely give it a shot if you come here and like Sushi at all.  It's very traditional (there are no forks to be had).  Kaiser is a really, really nice restaraunt, and the Kaiser signature burger is awesome.  A venue I've visited twice since I've arrived is a little Thai place called "Thai Cuisine" I believe... Apparently Harrison Ford once ate in this tiny little place, so, yeah, it's pretty solid.  Get whatever food you are going to eat before 9 PM.. if you delay, you're straight up fucked.

People:
The natives of the area are all friendly (like most tourist-y places).  The other people visiting are all pretty old.  This must be the Florida of California.  Nothing wrong with that, but, I think the average age of the people who visit has impacted the "mode" of the town.  Since grandma and grandpa have to go to sleep early to avoid the reaper, everything shuts down.

The Hilton:
Sucks.  Why stay at a more expensive hotel, and then pay more for the exact same crap you get at other places?  Paris Hilton is rich because of establishments like this?  Bitch should be folding blankets.  I've stayed in Best Western's that put this place to shame in terms of amenities, staff, location, and service.  Not even a continental breakfast.

Palm Springs probably really is a fun place to come and relax if you live near it, but, I feel sorry for anyone who has traveled a great distance to vacation here, as, that money could have been much better spent on a cruise or going to the beach.  Maybe you can make something of it if you're really good at enjoying yourself in the middle of the desert, by taking advantage of the jeep tours, and taking a hefty interest in geological formations, but, for me, I'll stick to beaches, roller coasters, cruises, zoos, and aquariums.  Hell, even a museum or DC trip wins.

The ESRI Developer conference is pretty interesting.  It's a good place to watch people demo and teach a little about technologies that you probably haven't had time to delve fully into, showing the abilities of each in a good format that will encourage you to give them a shot in your workplace.  I've learned a lot about Flex and Silverlight already, but I already knew the vast majority of other stuff.  The most entertaining thing is looking around and spotting out the "managerial" types who have booked themselves to the dev conference as a vacation rather than really trying to legitimately learn anything.  Also, the number of people in polos and khakis is mind-blowing.

Also, once you sleep on memory foam at home for a couple years, a hotel mattress pretty much sucks.

The most excruciating thing about this trip is being away from my awesome girlfriend, my awesome cats, and my dog.  

The Last House on the Left

*spoiler warning*

The 2009 remake of the 1972 original The Last House on the Left is definitely not for everyone, but it is relatively accurate to the original material.  The new movie replaces a good measure of the original's gritty, heavy material with some much-needed big-screen modern glitz, camerawork, and special effects, but ultimately, they are roughly the same.  The '72 version is perhaps a little more impactful in its unblinking observation of the terrible things that happen to Mari and her friend, but the aged quality of the film and cultural differences between 2009 and 1972 are very hard to see past if you aren't used to movies from that time period.

Generally, horror movies receive lower IMDB and other rating site scores than other genres, by a full point on average.  Because of this, finding the good horror movies is a difficult challenge.  While there are some innate problems with this movie in terms of composition and flow, I must highly recommend that it be viewed.  This is, however, still shock horror, so it is not to be watched by anyone who doesn't want to see depictions of incredible cruelty.  

So let's talk rape.  Central to this movie and the original is a very brutal rape/murder, or murder one girl then rape another, scene.  Honestly, I didn't expect it to make it into the movie intact, from the original.  And, well, it *almost* made it intact.  This is probably the most brutal rape scene in a widely released American movie that I have seen in the past 15 years.  The original movie's scene was perhaps a little worse in terms of sheer carnality, but the filming was not as well done, so I place these two scenes as relatively equal.  Most moviegoers won't be ready for the new scene, and if all of the little gut-wrenching details from the first movie were captured, I'm not sure this movie would have made wide release in the current atmosphere.  The '72 version and I Spit On Your Grave both did a fantastic job of portraying a terrible, terrible event, and using it to great effect.  The 2009 The Last House on the Left does so as well, and if it's toned down, it's by no more than 15%, which is made up for and easily forgiven by the quality of the production.

The plot, for those unaware, is as follows, from IMDB:
"After kidnapping and brutally assaulting two young women, a gang led by a prison escapee (Dillahunt) unknowingly finds refuge at a vacation home belonging the parents of one of the victims -- a mother (Potter) and father (Goldwyn) who devise an increasingly gruesome series of revenge tactics."

Eh, relatively accurate, IMDB.

As far as performances go, I was impressed!  Each character is well done, and painted as a unique individual with likeable nuances and quirks.  The badguys range from pathetic (well done!) to wicked (well done!).  Mari and her friend seem believable enough as teenagers trying to enjoy life in a small and boring town.  Everyone did a great job, and I think the director was able to masterfully focus on his best performers and use judicious camerawork to denigrate the effect of some of the unpolished acting that could have otherwise marred this movie.

Overall, I'd rate this movie 8 out of 10.  For a horror movie with nobody I've ever really seen in anything else, it's pretty damn good, and stacks up to the original fairly well.  Is the original better?  No, but only because it's so dated/low production quality.  A line by line remake of the original, updated for 2009, with the same actors probably would have had an edge, but this was still really good.

MPAA rating: R (for sadistic brutal violence including a rape and disturbing images, language, nudity and some drug use).
Running time: 1:40.
Opening: March 13.
Starring: Sara Paxton (Mari); Martha MacIsaac (Paige); Garret Dillahunt (Krug); Tony Goldwyn (John); Monica Potter (Emma).
Directed by: Dennis Iliadis; written by Adam Alleca and Carl Ellsworth, based on Wes Craven's 1972 film; produced by Wes Craven, Sean Cunningham and Marianne Maddalena. A Rogue Pictures release.

I've waited for this game to come out for, ohhh, well, since I imagined they would create it as a natural extension and continuation in the Total War series, so, back when ROME: Total War came out.  The Total War series is amongst my favorite titles, and I own all of them, and most expansions, from Shogun up to Medieval II.

So, I was incredibly delighted to be informed by Steam that a demo for Empire was ready to be played.  I dropped everything I was doing and started the install process.

My Review: 

Immediately, people with a similar configuration to me will notice a very long (3+ minute wait) during the initial loading screen.  Why we are forced to wait for so long reading the "bink video" and "Total War" logo is a complete mystery, but, some of us do have this wait.  Directly afterwards, the menu system seemed familiar, but, WOW, this demo is limited!  You get two "tutorials", which are about 95% useless if you're a Total War veteran, and 2 "Single Player Battles".  The campaign mode is absolutely not represented in the demo whatsoever.

Anyway, a few really, really long loading screens later the tutorial is loaded. (What is it doing, Creative Assembly?  Seriously?  We change our video and control options, and then we have to watch a "loading" bar again... why?  That should have been changing like 10 lines in an INI file somewhere.  Stop taking the interface away from the player.)

Ultimately, if you've played Medieval 2 and made use of the bombards and gunpowder weapons in that game, the land-based tutorial and battle example aren't going to offer anything new aside from taking cover behind obstacles and in buildings (which, you don't get to take advantage of as much as the CPU).  The graphics are impressive, with very nice attention to detail on everyone, but the performance is a considerable bit behind Medieval II (probably about 40% slower before lowering settings), while there's not really much improvement in quality(Maybe a 10-20% improvement in graphical quality).

The default control scheme is different from Medieval, using the WASD as default camera movement, Q and E to rotate camera, and so on.  This can easily be remedied in the options, and most veterans of the series will probably revert to old input methods.  The new in battle interface is superior to the prior versions in some ways but also lacking.  The unit cards seem weakened, and gathering information about the status of your soldiers is not as evident as it was before, but it does have a much cleaner and more professional look.  Function ultimately wins over form, but the improvements to form *almost* make up for the loss of function.  Maybe it's just a learning and adjustment issue, time will tell.

The Naval Battles are pretty awesome.  Great graphics, and each ship in your fleet feels like its own entity capable of turning the tide of battle if used correctly.  This portion did not run so well on the test computer, but victory was still relatively easily had.  

Honestly, it may have been a bad move for Creative Assembly/Sega/et al to release this demo, because according to google, several people are already having performance problems with it.  With no Campaign teaser to whet the appetite for carving a new world, all we're left with is an impressive demonstration of the naval battle engine, and a lot more of the "same old, same old" overland battle from the rest of the series.  It probably should have highlighted more of the differences in ground battles in the new game in addition to the ocean tutorial and sample battle.  Furthermore, the campaign mode is what many players play the game for, so it wouldn't have been too much to ask for a small sample campaign to toy with.

Without multiplayer, also, the Demo took this game from my "must buy" list to my "maybe I should read up on the forums for a couple months before I purchase this one" column.  I am still excited to play the full game, and I'm sure it's packed full of awesome surprises (they've been working on it long enough!), but with the way it performed and no insight as to what campaigns will really feel like to play aside from a few review site vids, I think i'll take my time getting this one.

But, anyway, it's a free demo, so give it a shot!

Magic:

The first time I played Magic was during 5th edition.  A friend of mine introduced me to it by showing me some cards, and I observed a couple of games.  I took my money from my high school computer lab job and went about buying several packages of cards, and amongst my circle of friends, learning the rules.

This process should not be skipped by any Magic player, as it is educational, fun, addictive, and a very good reason to get together with friends.  Yes, there is ridicule from the dullards of society, but, what won't they ridicule?  Anything that requires intellect is under fire from the mentally inept around you, chess club, books, role playing games, video games, anime, all of it... It is a sad state when the collection of morons is so great that one must be bold to undertake an innocent and fun hobby, but, it is nonetheless the state we are in.  Regardless, if you have not tried it, GET SOME CARDS AND PLAY.

The game can be enjoyed on many levels.  As a collector, you'll find yourself trying to locate rares and interesting or thematic cards.  As a casual player you'll find yourself building decks that employ esoteric strategies to defeat your opponents and have fun while doing it.  As a competitive player you'll be throwing cards out of your deck and refining it with cutt-throat precision at each loss, and seeking new opponents regularly.  

The Problem:

Sadly, for all the fun of it, many players will arrive where I have with the game: Continuously frustrated.  I am part casual and part competitive player.  I enjoy having fun with the cards, but I like to win at least a solid percentage of the time.  Due to the nature of the game, being a collectibles game, occasionally a friend will "outbuy" you.  Rare cards are generally more powerful, and, more expensive, such that a well-made deck of rares beats a well-made deck of uncommons or commons.  This can lead to a bit of an escalation effect, where you will find yourself blowing large amounts of cash at a local hobby store and leaving with only a handful of cards.  Then, of course, your friends can always play against those cards by spending more money (or finding a devilishly cheap strategy that undermines you specifically).  This makes Magic amongst friends a very frustrating event, sometimes.  

A typical Magic Game in progress:

One of the biggest problems for casual players of the game is "Net Decking".  This is when your opponents use the internet to research strategies, read deck lists of tournament winning decks, and otherwise use knowledge of the game not of their own design in order to gain an edge against the people they play with.  This, being done by a player with ample spare cash to blow, will leave a very bad taste in your mouth if you play them frequently, as there is no answer within the game that can be made up by practice or logical deck construction.  It comes down to money and research time  on the internet, rather than strategy and creativity.

Your friends who play this way are not to blame alone.  Wizards of the Coast designs the game such that not all cards are created equal in order to drive revenues as people buy up boxes of "booster packs" looking for a lucky find of a good rare (or now "Mythic Rare") card.  This means that many of the cards that you get will be decidedly "Sub-Optimal"... or, easily replaced in your deck by a different card.  If you read the tournament deck lists, you'll find a solid collection of about 24 cards that appear in just about every top 5 decklist.  It forms sort of a pyramid of strategies that are available, where there are hundreds of deck types and strats at the bottom tier 30 or so deck types that are really solid, and then maybe 10 "tournament win capable" decks in any block.

Furthermore, the "Tournament Legal" card list is generally comprised of the latest editions and all "blocks" since.  This allows Wizards to conveniently phase out entire blocks of cards and force interested players to buy new sets each year, and the real catch is, the newer the set, generally, the more powerful the cards or the better the "answers" to strategies defined in prior "blocks".  They establish an arms race and provide the weaponry.  Smart business tactic, but, it leads to a very sour game, since it's almost a game of "who is willing to spend $100 on a single deck build?"  AKA, "Franklin decking".  

"I can't seem to locate my bitterblossom, guys, I think I lost it under my giant pile of money."

Now, several aspects of the strategies that need nerfed really hard to help fix the game could be delved into, but, I'll save that for another article.  There is a solution to this right now, though.

OCTGN:

For a long time, some developers have been creating a tabletop card game interface for use over the internet.  One of the games that can be played in said interface, amongst people who have themselves downloaded "card sets"... is Magic the Gathering.  Downloading card sets may or may not be illegal, I really don't know, nor care, honestly, but it certainly can enable the game to be played without the "money scheme" that's been built into it by Wizards.

Enter OCTGN.  Armed with this free client, you can play full games of MTG with all the newest sets, up to CONFLUX as of this writing.  It is a perfect tool for testing deck builds without spending hundreds of dollars.  The deck builder alone is a nearly invaluable tool, as it functions so quickly and smoothly, without waiting for card images to download or pages to refresh, that I can't think of a single tool that matches it for this purpose.  There once was an old program called Apprentice32 that was very much like OCTGN, but I don't know where that development path went to... if you know, please comment :).

Here's what OCTGN 2.0 looks like:

Every once in a while, you try something new from the grocery store, and are surprised at how good it is for the price.  In a completely backwards age where people think that the "Dollar Menu" at a fast food restaurant is a good deal, an actually solid bargain is difficult to find.  Now, proponents of the big food industry would disagree and attempt to choke out anyone who mentioned "ramen noodles" by immediately spouting off how much sodium they contain and how quickly they will kill you, which has merit, but, let's be honest... a box of sugar coated cereal in milk is probably amongst the top reasons that America is obese anyway.

So, while we spiral into fatness and unhealthiness, why should we also drive down poverty lane?  Why not simultaneously get fat, reduce our lifespan, and save money, instead of just getting fat and reducing our lifespan?

Enter Ramen Noodles 2.0:

(Sorry for the small image, photography wasn't going to happen tonight for the sake of a noodle article).

This is the Nissin Foods "Chow Pasta" offering known as Tomato Basil.  With a retail cost of about $1 (One US Dollar), it comes in quite heftily above the price of ramen noodles... but, it's really good and there are actually a couple of qualitative differences.  In the United States, we tend to believe that an increased price is indicative of improved quality, even when there's literally no difference, sometimes.  This is not the case with this product.  

The taste is very strong and much better than your average pack of ramen noodles, and, the amount of food seems to be maybe just a bit more than regular ramen packets, though I'd have to examine the net weight to be sure.  If you haven't had the other "Chow" bowls, they generally have a couple packets that you mix in, instead of the usual one powder packet.  They take 6 minutes in the microwave, and are dead simple to make.  These noodles are filling and delicious, and this very different take on ramen should be very welcome to the kitchen of anyone who subsists on foods like this frequently.

The Chow Mein series of noodles by Nissin are tried and true.  All varieties of the "Chow Mein" series include: Orange Chicken, Kung Pao Chicken, Spicy Chicken, Teriyaki Beef, Chicken, Thai Peanut, Chinese Chicken Vegetable, and Shrimp. 

Of the available "Chow Mein" Noodles, I can recommend Chinese Chicken Vegetable, Chicken, and maybe Spicy Chicken, but the last isn't so great.  They're a buck, so, give them all a try if you get a chance, I've only tried those three. 

So, eat the Tomato Basil and Chow Meins, save some money, and consider how actually tiny those $1 menu offerings at a fast food restaurant are.  

As far as health is concerned, Nissin's ramen generally comes in at a little less sodium count than the other varieties available, but, don't expect to grow skinny eating stuff like this on a daily basis.  These are cheap, quick, and delicious meals, designed to save time and money.  Buy one of these for every 4 or 5 ramen packs, and you'll be addicted to the variety in no time. 

I also havent tried the Alfredo variety, but they are pretty good, too.